busy keeping up with the fast-paced yesterday, today and tomorrow. inactive online because of the other wonders of internet prone to sickness, physically, mentally and virtually.
I chatted on the phone with an old friend yesterday. He asked me - "what happened to you?". He asked me if i've forgotten the clan. He asked me where were all the words i said, he asked me what happened to the clan. He asked me was it that i had no friend that i came to the clan, that i used the clan as replacement. I don't know really. I'm sorry if i have been negligent, and that i chose not to meet up anymore. I figured that we just didn't click, he cried on the phone, i was out for reasoning. He blamed himself, i blamed no one. He blamed me, i blamed no one. I retorted, reiterated each time, that it just didn't work out, we were close because of the competition, and that was the only time we spent with the whole clan almost 4 times a week. I tried to make him understand, but he couldn't, i tried to tell him i didn't feel the attachment, but he wasn't listening. I was irritated, he didn't know. He told me his problems, he didn't know mine yet. I told him i've given up, i don't know what happened to me, maybe it just wasn't meant to be. He still questioned me, i still couldn't answer. Maybe that was part of my venture, looking for somewhere where i am nascent, which i feel i now. Why can't people just stop thinking of themselves and think others for once. He's thinking that maybe it's his fault that we don't hang out anymore, it's his fault, he cries almost everyday, i know i should pity him, but there's just an element missing, there's no same interest anymore, i just find it plainly annoying now, the further he digs it in, the more i repel. Why think of himself, we all know it's over buddy, WHY THE FUCK DO YOU QUESTION? I used to think were best friends, i'm sorry i said that, maybe because you said that, so maybe it was on impulse that i said that too, but i can't take back my words can't i?
busy keeping up with the fast-paced yesterday, today and tomorrow.